Commitment Issues

I'm starting to think I have commitment issues but can you blame me
I guess it all started with the two people that named me
Parents wasn't married, Dad left at an early age
Got married but I only saw the part of the story my mother played
Never really seen happiness, I was loved as child
But when it came to the real thing, I didn't see love as a child
Had to ask my dad to visit like he couldn't ask me
It was as if I wanted to unlock him I had to use my key
Mom wasn't in steady relationships for reasons that she felt inside
Most of it was self - dependence and the other half was pride
Grandpa really wasn't an example to follow
So when momma found her a dude that was interested she just came off hollow
Pops was married a few times and then had other dimes
I sometimes wonder what was going through my dad's mind
Was it regular or was that he had the same issues?
Or was it that his heart didn't recognize soiled tissues?
Was he afraid that he was making a mistake by taking a chance?
Or did he feel controlled as if the women he held close had him in the palm of their hands?
Did he feel as if being a husband didn't mean he was a man?
Or did he feel like a puppet like who whenever his master walked he had to kiss their feet and land?
I talked to older men and this is what they say
"Son, your woman's always right" but do I really have to watch with my controller and entertain the games that they play?
I'm suppose to be a king, you telling me to be a pawn?
I need to talk to a bishop, I just don't want my queen to think or do me wrong
I don't wanna be a doormat, someone people think they can step on
Ima human freaking being with its own heartbeat and it's own song
But maybe I'm over thinking it, I wonder what my parents would say
If my dad was still here and threw these questions their way