The Thoughts of a Woman on the Edge

Thinking, deep thinking. Contemplating on my reality like, "Wtf was I thinking?" "Why did I convince myself that this was a good thing? Why did I give myself up to this so easily,....as if it was my only choice to act in a manner unseemly?? What logic did I give myself to convince myself that the sacrifice of my moral code would be the key to help a friend or family in need......like it would be the good deed written in the Most High's scrolls to help those who I now know are snakes to succeed......damn..... Where does that lead me?? Am I just to be the new brand of suckers waiting to be sold?? Or should I seek the King of Kings to help restore my soul?? Been hurt so many times, I'm questioning myself like should I trust Him?? I heard about Him from a lot of people, but they use an alias to descibe Him..........…..I really want to know about HIM…..but will He accept me as the mess that I’ve become??......My soul is scarred, bruised, and bloody….almost at its deathbed. My mind is rushing and dreaming of the comfort of being dead. My heart is waiting for the last beat of the drum. Can this King of kings save this dying soul of mine?? Will He want to revive a life that’s at the borderline?” These are the thoughts of a woman on the edge.