Paintbrush

My paintbrush is ready

Ready to use colors and lines that are forbidden to go over

But the lines in this painting will be ignored

Because the best paintings don't have boundaries 

I'll put my insecurities on a canvas first

Cause as a child I was never really accepted

Nobody liked me or so I thought and if they did their thoughts were deceptive

Wanting to love somebody so bad

Maybe I was just trying to replace some of the things I felt I was entitled to but never had

Strokes of blue for all the tears I've cried

But still nothings been able to dry up the tears from when my father died

Blues for the love of the ocean I've had since a kid growing up close to that long beach

Cause the sound of the waves coming ashore and the sight of water swaying different directions always kept me at a place of peace

Splatters of red for the anger I've kept inside 

These angers I can't seem to hide nor get rid of no matter how far I fly

These angers that no punching bag can take at a consistent pace

And is the only thing constantly keeping me in this race 

Pinks for the loves that have come, the loves that were lost and the loves that got away. There's a few of those

But the thought of where I would be without those love is something only God knows

I'd put yellow on the canvas for the things I've let hold me back due to being scared 

Cause if I had ignored those things and went along with the things I was scared to do then many more good and bad moments would be shared 

Lastly, gold. Even though it's probably not a color you can put on a paintbrush but it's only necessary for this story to unfold

Because in life we all have golden moments with golden people at golden times

Whether it's hanging out with your father and brother cause those events can never happen again unless you rewind

Or going to wrestling events with your mother after she tried hard to get those tickets you could enjoy yourself and be nervous in line

Or you as an adult sharing your poetry on a great site so people can live and see your life through your rhymes

This paintbrush..........will do more than create art

Cause with every stroke, with every detail it'll reveal your heart. Peace.