Empty

All around me pregnancy & babies!

My cousins, my sisters, my friends everyone but me

I say I came to terms with the fact   I may never conceive

I still feel so much jealousy

My friends and family say they envy me

“Girl you so lucky you don’t have babies”!

Would they feel the same if they were in my shoes?

How lucky would they feel walking every day in my childless shoes?

My heart aches and there is emptiness inside

Everyone says I am a mother in every sense of the word

I have taken care of plenty of kids I have been a great step mom

Maybe that’s why I haven’t had my own

Maybe I was meant to take care of babies not wanted and thrown away

I know God has a specific plan for me……

Knowing all of these things I know are true in my heart this still does not dull the pain

Living in my childless world with a forever empty womb