Exposed

Poured out like liquor for the homies

I generously gave you part of me

Wishfully thinking that maybe part of you

Would anxiously seek out the best in me

Would gracefully humor my desperate plea

For somebody, anybody to see the real me

To see what God sees when He looks at me

To look past the smiles hiding the agony

To want more than the dyke who is such a cutie

Desiring an unbreakable bond betwixt me and thee...

Like raped flood gates I bore to you my soul

Allowing ample opportunity to make this broken puzzle whole

But in reflection I learn that you only stole

And where the pieces once were, therein dwells a hole

Some days with no hope of darkness turned to light

Mind racing with thoughts penetrating peaceful nights

Conclude with realization that you've given me every right

To hate you, to let your existence take flight

But I don't; and though I should, I simply won't...

Because the painful truth is that I chose to bleed to you

Infatuation blinding me from your selfish roots

That uprooted when I showed you my love was true

You used them to screw me like a prostitute

Money on the table but still empty, what am I to do...

Clearly money doesn't buy real friendship and affection

Knowledgeable of this, I simply gave it to you

Because I thought you were caring enough to return it

Gazing up, all I see is a chucked up deuce

Here it is years later I've gone from pieces to strings

Just a joker to those I've treated as kings and queens

Told that I should remain a loving being

For the sole purpose of continuing to take advantage of me

Someone please tell me where the hell is my soul

To my so called friends, please return the part you hold

To my family, help me to conceal this black hole

Love me back to being unexposed, once again whole

-Akin