Our Arrangement (A Poetic Short Story)

CATEGORY

just different

THIS wasn’t part

of the arrangement,

but this time I sensed

something was changing.

Her caress

a little more tender.

Her core

more eagerly surrendered.

Her after glow

brighter than embers

on a moonless night in December.

She embraced me tighter

than I ever remembered

her cleaving to me

before….

before I walked out of her door…

yet again.

I had always come back for more,

although I had not looked back before.

But where I parked had changed...

as would my perspective.

And as I passed her window pane

my line of sight was redirected.

I believe it was her pain I saw

naked in the dark –

emotions exposed and raw.

Was it anger, depression or shame?

Some emotional complexity

my mind could not frame

with mere words?

My vision soon blurred

with the waters of remorse

at the thought that what we have

could exact so high a cost,

and there’s no way that I can help with this…

and witnessing the effects of my selfishness

is more than I can bear.

Immobilized,

I stand and stare

immortalizing her

in my memory;

cataloging all we shared

before going home to my family

knowing I can never come back,

because...

THIS was not part of the arrangement.

-HymnAgen