Roses Doesn’t Fly

The time I felt mislead, denied from all things.

Mentally broken down but physically built well.

The heart feels heavy and it hurts everyday.

Her genuine personality that nobody sees but me kills the last bit of control I contain.

Ignore what the mind speaks and follows the retarded soul of mine.

The soul of mine.

I dont even know him, but he know everything about me.

Takes control when I try to breathe, I swear it kills.

Rather die than numb the pain, live with a bullet over the rose.

Poison rushing through my veins, feeling weaker and weaker.

The sacrifice for putting you before myself.

Were you grateful?

So selfish and blid though you tend to seach what I seek.

I’ll forever forgive you for making it hard to cry but the stress is so manipulative.

Grab the rope, unload the pistol, pop a xanax to shoot my at my soul, hang from a distance, die in my sleep in accidental overdose.

But you wont like that though.

You’ll rather want me to live rather than grieve about me.

My soul abuses me and the bruises reveal in my eyes.

I don’t know why your so special.

In control.

I would pray to be in that same situation with you.

The Heavens seem so difficult and if I can never accept myself, the afterlife will never effect me.

I just want to smile, stuck in miserable redemption....