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This slovenly schmoozer with little schnauzer zing
of a seminal; slithering smallish sneaking sexual sneezer ying
doth spring Aesop; purr eye hiz snooker ring
snoop doggy dog wolf er snapper sleeps har biding time sing
hing, cuz, ha aint give a hooter nor rats ass
forsooth, the hell bells sans salvation army volunteers
will rattle tinkling kettle drums flush with balls o fiery brass
which aye reckon, I haint nuttin boot a proud prick
many might consider me scrooge incarnate and crass
dis jolly saint nick glee fully flashes his bum to the mob that squabble
like angry birds twittering feigning moo cho grass
see us, stalking def leppards while off in the woods
little red riding hood doth blissfully, dreamily, and friskily –
amble, cheese an innocent oblivious prepubescent jail bait
unaware, she will be tricked and hood winked from wolfish lusty wand
and become ransacked, quite frightful for a story book lass
while within the town foursquare, a crowdsource coalesces
when veteran black Friday shoppers push and shove vin
evoking one huge phallic sized mass
rivaling Alaska Bull Worm, which humans
resemble loch ness creature obscure, within black lagoon morass
coiling, frothing, and insidiously writhing –
while analogous sinister effort hatched faux hidden joystick
to shift inside gummy topface virgin cum pass
as madcap buyers blithely ignore politesse
and simultaneous occurring rapacious seduction
in an effort to be first thru latched glass
doors – trampling underfoot pokey folks nsync with popped cherry
spewing merry ***ing Christmas expletives cause zing sass
dis doddering dude dost wanna hello kitty to or rate
ma Christmas tree...Christmas tree...
How about some soup per whoop pea!?
SERVED UNDER MISSILE TOW, THRU STRAIGHTENED
CIRQUE CUM STANCES: EXOTIC FUN WITH THIS SANTA
After struggling like Houdini in a strait jacket, I finally got this dang red suit off my sweaty body!
Nobody knew utter exhaustion to flit to and fro hither and yon trotting across the globe and nearly burning my bum while chancing this outsize girth of mine down the chimney flue.
The elves clamor to go on strike and demand fair trade representation while the slew of reindeer protest against animal cruelty forced to defy gravity and risk slipping off icy roofs.
Do not even ask about the missus.
Ya know why?
Clause i haint gonna yak how she rattles me chains like an unstoppable steam pot.
She fumes and fusses without any letup.
So what if this pedophile hash tagged Santa wants to sin and warm up my chestnuts against some trembling girl to perform more than a lap dance!
Prove to this avuncular grandfather type myth ta sanity claws (who feigns to chuckle with mirth merely for publicity), that he commits egregious horror jacking learning nymph qua, how a kit can please mum peppy pooch!
