LOST MY APPETITE

Tales Of Old Men

he told me
the allure
the aphrodisiac 
was all in the chase
the pursuit of the object
the plan of attack
the blueprint etched in the beginnings
and the happy endings

he told me
the moments that made him sweat
the sleepless nights 
the imagination running wild
the things he would do
once he had the prey in his possession
not mounting it on the wall
or
maybe he might just do that
whispering to it
how long he desired it
and
how difficult
yet
unquenchably desirous he was of it

he told me
that nothing short of death would keep him from it
not owning it
in a sense
but having it in his possession
to admire it
salivating during the length of the hunt
and watching it salivate 
as it watched him transport it home

yeah
he told me
it was st...

Voyeurisms

I like to sit and watch
ticket purchased in advance
always choosing the back row mezzanine
dark attire
so nobody knows I been in the building

I am over 21
heard about it
seen it all on channels I had to pay for
'cause this stuff can't be on prime time 
youngsters ain't suppose to see and hear
too young to be voyeurs
or
maybe they should be
depending on strict or loose upbringings

air conditioning blasts
but I am so hot
my voyeurism hormones in overdrive
personal summer
as she once told me she had
but 
I don't know about that stuff
ditching the dark hoodie 
velvet crimson curtains separate
bare wooden planks of the stage 
an older bar stool front and center
silver mic
hold steady in its holster

voyeurism
I wanna see it stripped down
layers
peeling away...

Totally

it is
the voice of Phyllis Hyman
or whoever you got on your Bluetooth playlist
while you buzz around the house
doing this
or doing that
or efficient efforts in doing absolutely nothing
so angelic in your accomplishments
or not
 
it is
the heads secretly nodding at the supermarket
behind the backs of their own wives
checking out the honey ham on sale for the kid’s school lunches
and you
just wearing my old college hoodie and jeans
choosing this 
or choosing that
or bypassing it altogether
we already got too many at home
and don't really need to have it all
 
it is
you walking through the church doors
the preacher man suspends his holy dance in midair
quite sure 
the holy ghost done sent their best angel to grace the aisle seat
third pew to the left
and them f...

Look But Don't Touch

(Dusted this old one from the 90's attic...")

you've got a face like an angel 
built like a Nubian queen
your pair of eyes shine the brightest 
like no one else's I’ve seen
we've been together for a long while 
and I just can’t understand
why you won't let me get close enough 
to even touch your hand

I know this is the nineties 
and things ain't what they were before
you've got me praying and wishing
for some hugging and kissing
I wanna get close to you
but what else can I do?

but then you tell me
you can look but don't touch
but if you ask me
I say you're asking too much...
you tell me
you can look but don't touch
but if you ask me
I say you're asking too much

oh, the things that you wear 
not a wrinkle can I fin...

Sacred Room

before I entered the sacred room
sounds of symphony strings
harps
violins
Brazilian guitars strumming
before I entered the sacred room
pedals of roses strewn across my path
leading to the great door 
slightly ajar the end of the archway 
torches flicker along both sides of the hallway
portraits of you
masterpieces all
beckon
entreating me to hasten my steps
before I entered the sacred room
sounds of angels
sacred hymns in languages I couldn’t translate
sopranos
their high notes running through me
awakening my senses
tingle every nerve as I hastened my steps
before I entered the sacred room
just a few feet before me
door ajar
trembling hands reaching for the latch
the gods summoned
provide me the strength
for the weight of the great ancient wooden door
would take all that ...

Arrival In Greece

when I came to
time passed
seasons changed 
storms turned into rainbows
and
rainbows turned into storms
that I didn't remember hearing this morning
when I came to
my tongue spoke languages  
unfamiliar to me
subtitles unnecessary 
I thought it was my native tongue
no translation necessary
she understood every utterance
when I came to
Ovidean script written in Greek pen
crawls slowly against the ceiling
like a Hollywood marquis
wrinkled white toga
seen strewn across the other side of the room
when I came to
swimming in the waters of myself
perspiration
floating backwards 
morning sun shining down upon me
no
that was your eyes 
peering into the present state of helplessness
when I came to
I heard her say something
whisper something
barely ...

Everytime

(Lyrics to the wedding song I had sung to my wifey by my best friend... she had no idea I wrote and composed the music... special moment...)

everytime
I think of you
there I am staring into space
my mind just wonders off
and there I am in another place
holding hands with you
while we walk along a sandy shore
and everytime I turn around
I find I'm needing you more and more

just to run my hands slowly through your hair
please don't mind if I stare
too long
I hope this is what it seems
and is not a dream
so much love I feel
it must be wrong

without an invitation 
you searched and found the key
and unlocked the doors to me
and there`s no way that I can lose
because you'll be the one
I'll choose

everytime
you call my name
reality just fades away
I get so wrapped up inside y...

Commitment

(true story.... but the "thing" didn't work out down the road)
 
I am quite sure I know
exactly
what you are looking for
 
closely studying the billboard signs erected along the highways of your life
reading between the lines
rolling down the window on the drivers' side
slowing my pace
taking a good look at your face
as you speak in parables over dinner
neither of us saints
neither of us a hardcore sinners 
destined to be rescued at the last minute

all of this is a test
sometimes
the key is just to be in it until the end
and the parables you speak aloud are quite unique
in that all of us are different
but travel in the same boat
in the same water we float until the tide pulls us to shore
so
I know
exactly
what you are looking for
 
I can only tell you th...

Blue Lights In The Basement

(loved this album back in high school...)
 
blue lights in the basement
Roberta and Donny sing to me
slowly
softly 
getting me closer to you in the dark corner by the washer
dryer 
and clothesline
 
secluded moments
whispered words uttered
not to be remembered tomorrow
neither one of us could translate
anticipating
from the moment the first slave chain rattled onto the Savannah shoreline
dollars laid hand to hand
as she cried
and pleaded for her children in muffled silence
she was next in line
eventually
becoming my turn to writhe not in unspeakable pain
but to be transfixed with you in the corner of this basement while
Norman Connors takes me away on his spaceship
tonight
on time arrival
never late
 
trying to comprehend the juxtaposition between pain 

With Lust

(didn't know I had these many in the attic!)

lust
seduced me into a moment of unfaithfulness
drawing in my wandering gaze
your fingers 
felt reaching out to me in a dimly lit hallway
running sinfully through my hair
filling my mind with a myriad of thoughts
social
historical
carnal 
poetic thoughts

door left ajar
low light seen on the night stand
creeping
again
along the dimly lit back hallway 
not wanting to get caught red handed
satisfying my moment of gratification

but
I couldn't help myself

was transfixed
mesmerized  
lusting
when I saw the first three lines of your poem

fever pitched curiosity 
hating the term
"nosey"
but it is what it is
and that's alright

the first three lines of your poem
s...