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Despite my fire and energy an elephant remains,
trying to make sense of why my mother rejects my claims.
I can't see why you hate me so and chose my abusive father,
over all your kids and family, we were forced to suffer.
You've turned my sisters, aunties, uncles and my brother,
against me to more rejection, how can you do that you're my mother?
The people in the school tried to help and undertsand but again you turned them too?
I had no other choice but to pack my bags and run away from you.
Why's it so hard to hear my story and retain my struggle,
make me feel like I wanna divorce you all and burst your precious bubble.
Everything I know now I taught my teenage self,
from 9 years old the school of hard knocks put qualifications under my belt.
Do you never stop and wonder why the streets were my better option,
i'm 12 years old with nowhere to turn, cold, hungry and forgotten.
The times you would hear the bumps and bangs, my safety no priority,
submissive child with no good friends underveloped and trying desperately,
seeking love from somewhere else so I know I ain't worth nothing,
drugs and booze always cushioned the blows, not brave enough for self-cutting.
Now i'm an alcoholic, mental disordered, disabled and helpless,
my friends working their fingers to the bone trying to help me through this mess,
you know i'm all alone, in need of help and too disabled for independence,
but still none of this bothers you, no it doesn't make a difference.
One day when i've beaten this monster battle I WILL shine brighter,
than all of you whom reckon you're better than me, i'm a winner and a fighter.
I'm going places that were only dreams when shaking in the dark,
and i'll love my friends and future family in complete opposite to your cold heart.
My only revenge 'mother'!
Copyright2013
